FFF #13

Sweating profusely, Allan groped around for something to steady himself. His hand grasped her dressing table but his wet palms skidded, sending bottles of perfume, an extra large Johnson and Johnson baby powder container and a black jar of Let’s Jam hair gel flying.
She steupsed, watching her prized Bulgari perfume hit the floor, cap and bottle parting ways on impact.
“Wha is your scene dred?” she asked, glaring at him as she jumped up to retrieve her possessions.
“I thought you is a playa playa, is not you who say your middle name is able and how you will rock my world? Why you acting like you having a panic attack?”
She was on all fours now, right hand groping under the bed for the perfume cap.
He looked at her, watched her unfettered breasts swing with every movement of her arm, dark nipples brushing the floor as her body dipped and rose.
He couldn’t believe this was happening to him. Finally, after months of flirting and “gun talk”, as the old people liked to say, he scored a chance to bed the hottest girl at Muscle Flexx gym.
He gulped, willing his head to stop spinning and groaning silently as his belly made a gurgling sound.
“I will fucking kill Tyrone,” he thought angrily. Tyrone was his personal trainer of two years and close friend. He worked at Muscle Flexx for six years and was considered the go-to man in the gym. People went to him for everything: steroids, weight-loss pills, condoms, fete tickets and, in the ladies’ case, “special massages”. Tyrone gave about two to three “special massages” a day, in the room with the door marked supplies. Where he got the energy from, Allan didn’t know, but Tyrone always boasted that he left the girls wanting more.
Tyrone had given his massages to almost every woman in the gym, except her. She of the dark chocolate complexion, the kind that was just smooth, even and unblemished. She of the tiny waist and the bottom that defied logic, the kind that made men stop dead in the middle of the road staring at it before shaking their heads and trying to remember what they were about.
Not that Tyrone hadn’t tried to get with her. From the first day she walked in, almost six months ago, he had done everything to get her on his massage table. But she never took him on. Instead, she traded smiles with Allan, made fun of his grunting sounds when he did his tricep curls, and wondered aloud if the faces he made while doing free weights were the same as his sex faces.
Soon enough, they had swapped cell numbers and began texting or as the young people say today, sexting.
When they finally decided to stop playing games and seal the deal, Allan couldn’t wait to see the look on Tyrone’s face when he broke the news.
“You lie,” he guffawed. “Boy, you could handle that? You see she bumper? You could ride dat riddim as Bunji say?”
Allan laughed but he knew Tyrone was jealous. He was almost regretting telling Tyrone his business until Tyrone made him an offer he couldn’t refuse.
“Look, you is my boy so I will hook you up. I can’t let you go down like no punk, that girl look like a real tiger.”
Tyrone went to his locker and returned with a small brown bottle. “Here, take this. Drink it two hours before you go by she, you will be alright,” he said, handing it to Allan.
“Just make sure and eat first eh.”
“So this is your secret?” Allan asked, holding the bottle up to the incandescent light.
“Shush boy, just relax and go represent for your boy,” he said.
Allan growled, doubling over as yet another spasm shook his abdomen.
“Represent my ass, it look like I have to represent on the toilet,” he fumed to himself.
Looking up, Allan realised she had left the room; the pink see-through top she had taken off earlier was no longer on the bed.
“Here, drink this. Don’t feel bad, we could take a raincheck,” she said, walking through the door with what looked like antacid fizzling in a glass.
Allan gulped it down and reached for his pants. He didn’t even get to take off his boxers and show her what he was working with.
“You feeling better?” she asked as he limped into her living room.
“Yeah, I better go now. I will call you,” he said quietly, anxious to make quick his exit from this embarrassing situation.
In his car, he pulled out his cell and dialed Tyrone.
“Man, what the ass you give me? I do what you say but that thing have my belly real hurting. I start to cold sweat, feeling like I ready to pass out. You set me up you jealous bastard,” he shouted.
“What? Set you up,” asked Tyrone incredulously. Then there was silence. “Wait, hold on,” he said.
“Yeah, what bottle I give you? It have a pink bunny on it?”
“Pink bunny? What shit you asking me Tyrone, the bottle eh have no bun…” Allan paused, as he took the bottle out of the glove compartment and examined it. Sure enough, near the cap there was a very small picture of a pink bunny.
“Yeah boy, it have a bunny.”
“Oh Gooood Allan boy, I give you the wrong bottle. That is the laxative for my dog. Ooops, my bad.”

Rumoured food shortage fuels panic buying

With news that flour prices are set to increase by over 30 per cent come Tuesday, and rumours of shortages of rice and flour, consumers in Trinidad have begun panic buying.

As a result, supermarket shelves for items such as flour, rice, baking powder, and macaroni have been empty across the country. Consumers have also blamed the empty shelves on hording activity by supermarket owners.

Rising food prices are a global phenomenon, and with wheat prices rising steadily, Trinidad, which imports all of its wheat, is experiencing almost weekly price increases.

Adding to the issue is the Nutrimix's closure of one of its facilities for cleaning. Nutrimix is one of two flour producers in the country, the other being the National Flour Mills. The closure of Nutrimix's plant resulted in rumours of a flour shortage, which resulted in panic buying. In one case, a supermarket owner limted the purchase of 100kg bags of flour to one per person, on the condition they were buying other items.

With flour prices set to increase, the price of bread is expected to reach as much as $10. Already consumers seemed to have stopped buying commercial bread which remained stocked on supermarket shelves.

Headlines

Another one of this week's assignments is looking at headlines, how effective they are, do they pull the reader in, do they convey a sense of the story. Below are five headlines that I do not like:

Beach limers do it on sand

While concise and snappy, this headline, taken from the Trinidad Express, really does not tell me what the story is about. What's the "it" that beach limers are doing? And if you are a foreigner reading this online, you would be even more confused by the word limers and probably move on...unless your dirty mind is intrigued by the thought of people "doing it on sand".


Throngs at rivers

Again from the Express, this headline does not work for me. To me it's lacking and reeks of laziness like the sub-editor was tired and didn't know what to write. A snappier version could have been Rivers rule this Easter or something like that.


Primary Ideas

This headline, taken from the Barbados Nation, just does not work for me. The story is about primary school students coming out on top at a science competition, but you would never guess that from this headline. It does not tell you anything about the story nor it is catching.


Site Suspended After Promoting Dutch Lawmaker’s Anti-Qur’an Movie

This efluxmedia headline is too long for me. I have seen other headlines on the story that are shorter, snappier and less clumsy.


It will take more than one great speech for Obama to reassure some Democrats

This is the headline from a letter to the editor in the International Herald Tribune but to me it is way too long and unwieldy. I don't know if a double stacked headline works on the web, it's an assault to the eyes for me.


Headlines I like:

Pirates of the Caribbean? Antigua Firm Cracks Blu-ray DRM

This is a techie story but the headline, the play on the movie and what the Caribbean developers have done certainly works for me. It got my attention.


Jericho Nuked by CBS

I love my entertainment news and this headline from E! online is so clever. It's a play on Jericho, the biblical city being destroyed, used to describe what CBS did to the television series based on that historical place. LOL.. I love it!

'Mother' gooses up Britney's comeback

This USA Today headline immediately pulled me in. It's a play on the words Mother Goose and is very cleverly used to describe Britney Spear's efforts on the sitcom How I Met Your Mother. Clever not tacky.


Snow and sleet mark beginning of spring

This Guardian headline is simple, straight to the point and effective.


'He made love to the audience'

This Guardian article, in memory of British actor Paul Scofield sets the tone for what the article would be about. In one sentence it encapsulates the talent of the man.


Off to meet Santa

This headline from Richard Quest's blog on CNN"s Business Traveller is simple but got to me cause going to Lapland to meet Santa has always been my dream. The headline promises a story full of adventure and interesting tidbits.


Pawn Shops: Business Is Booming

This headline from the Huffington Post caught my eye. I have been following the economic meltdown in the US and this headline, which gives a human interest face to the meltdown, is interesting.

Sharmain's blog

Of all the class blogs I have viewed so far, I really like Sharmain's blog. It is clean and simple and everything is well ordered. Plus she is so brutally honest about the assignments, it makes me laugh.

Blogs I like

I read a lot of blogs, mainly because I love the diversity of information one can get from blogs. It's hard to select a favourite but since I have to, my top three choices are:
Caribbean PR
Huffington Post
Global Voices



Caribbean PR is a blog owned by PR professional Karel McIntosh. She uses this blog as a medium to educate other PR professionals about trends in their field, and to solicit views from professionals all over the Caribbean. She includes interviews with other professionals and also invites guest bloggers such as myself.



I first visited the Huffington Post last year after seeing its owner Arianna Huffington on Real Time with Bill Maher. I was intrigued about how she has been able to make her blog a reliable, viable source of news and information alongside traditional media. It's like a news site, with news of all types and commentary.



Global Voices is an international blog that takes contributions from bloggers all over the world. The emphasis here is on developmental stories as well as other stories that the mainstream media would most likely ignore. Truly alternative and very informative.

Beaches closed as rough seas batter Caribbean coastlines

Rough seas with waves reaching over 30 feet in some cases, marred the long Easter weekend for many beachgoers.

From Tobago to Puerto Rico, beaches across the Caribbean were closed and beachgoers warned to stay out of the water, as high waves pounded coastlines.

In Barbados one man died when he ignored warnings and drowned during an early morning swim. In Dominica, authorities were up to Saturday searching for a 19-year-old New York resident who disappeared in the choppy waters.

The rough seas, the result of an Atlantic storm, disrupted plans of many people who take advantage of the long Easter weekend to relax at the sea.

In Tobago, which usually sees a peak of visitors around this time of year, authorities said the closed beaches may give visitors the opportunity to discover other aspects of the island.

In Puerto Rico hotels were left scrambling with alternative forms of entertainment for their guests.

To read more click here

RSS Feeds

This blog was really created to fulfill a class assignment for the Knight Centre's Digital Journalism course. Hopefully, it will continue on and not go the way of all my other blogs, which I usually delete when boredom sets in...lol

The assignment is to subscribe to an RSS reader with five feeds and two new searches.

I chose to download Google Reader, mainly because I use different computers during the day- the office computer while I am in the office, and my Mac Book at night, when I get home. With Google Reader, I can access all my news and blogs no matter where I am, and since I have been Google user for the last year, it's just easier to share clips with friends who are on my email list.

The feeds I added are from:

Caribbean Net News: A regional roundup of news
BBC Caribbean: For up-to-date news on the Caribbean
Caribbean PR: A blog run by a PR practitioner, which covers technology and other PR trends in the region
The Manicou Report: A satirical look at life in the Caribbean
Caribbean Cricket: Cricket blog that is on the pulse of cricket in the Caribbean.

The News searches are from:
Google
Yahoo
In both I tailored my searches to all things Caribbean and RSSed them to Google Reader.